With the Russian madman causing mayhem in the world, I am really trying to maintain a positive outlook.

The war news is dominating and it’s difficult to avoid. But am very aware of how my mental health can affect my physical health, so I am attempting (and so far succeeding) to limit my news watching/viewing. I look at just enough to get a very superficial overview but even that is more than I want. I feel so sad for all the people affected by this megalomaniac!

It’s been an interesting 10 days in my world, as well. The 5th chemotherapy session went off as normal but for some reason, it really knocked me back. I did’t feel ill, there were no new side effects or anything like that. I was just SO tired, I couldn’t get out of my own way. Friends asked, “Are you sleeping?” and yes I am. It’s not a sleep deprivation tiredness; it’s a wholebody fatigue. I spent a week just vegging in my chair, reading and watching a bit of Netflix. (Haven’t succumbed to too much binge watching - yet!) And then yesterday woke up with an almost back to normal feeling. Weird!

With one more planned chemo session in 10 days, I’m looking forward to moving beyond the wait and see phase to where decisions on future treatments can be made. Being patient hasn’t always been my strong point, but so far, I’ve managed to live with the uncertainty of no real plan. And hope this changes in the next month.

Timing is everything and I believe there are no such thing as coincidences. What are the chances of Julie meeting someone at the Shongweni Farmers Market where she was meeting a friend? Someone I haven’t seen for more than 60 years and whose mother, a midwife, actually delivered me! It was destined, I’m sure.

And when we Jean and I met for breakfast after connecting on WhatsApp, it was as if we have been friends forever. But it’s was with sadness that we missed so many years of actual in-person friendship and didn’t meet earlier. Jean lives in Australia and has been here in South Africa for 2 months and leaves this coming week. But that brief encounter was enough to cement the friendship and I’m really happy to be able to remain in contact with her.

Jean also had some observations about stuff from my childhood that I sort of knew, but coming from her through her mother the midwife, who was one of Mum’s best friends, it explains, at least to me, some of my teenage rebellion, etc. And which, when I think back, had a huge effect on me and who I grew up to become. Of course, as both mothers are long gone, there’s no way of talking to them for verification or explanation. For instance, we will never know why my two older brothers and sister were all sent away before I was born. Or why our dear friend Sue, who was just 8 and as close to family as anyone could be, was also not allowed to see me, the new baby. That’s something Sue told me just last week. What a mystery.

Maybe I’ll see a psychic…